Evil Super Villain Emails

Obviously I'm not a pro at this whole "staying updated" thing. I need more time! I promise you guys I'm gonna get this together. A post a week is my goal, and I suppose I should take into account as well that I already have over 300 views on this thing. That's a fair amount of people who have read this and probably wished my last post wasn't three months ago. I apologize to anyone who has been unnecessarily faithful. I'll name you Joe.
So Joe, expect a post every Sunday morning! The Sunday Usual. Email me Joe! I heart questions and/or suggestions. You see with questions I can, well....here:

"Dave was a malicious super villain. As usually goes, Dave, being an evil super villain, spent his days doing nothing less than concocting different impractical means of destroying the earth. Dave, along with every other super villain to enter the comics, never realized the uselessness of this goal. I mean seriously, what is he left with and anyway, Dave was missing something that 98 percent of other super villains had already obtained: a cool nickname. Besides the absence of this necessity, Dave was also faced with yet another dilemma. Although he spent his days meditating on diabolical plans of destruction, none of these plans ever succeeded. Everyone knew this however, because....the world was still in existence. However the main reason for Dave's failure occurred as a result of him not actually having any plans. All of his meditation and thoughtfulness had been in vain, for the fruit of his thought had ceased to sprout. Dave died a complete failure."

Well, let's be thankful Dave never succeeded, but really, all he would have needed in order to destroy the world was a good idea that worked. Even if his ideas never profited it could still be said that he tried. Seeing as how Dave apparently did not have the inward capability to produce ideas, we can submit two conclusions:
a. He should have pursued a different career.
b. Now that he's stuck in this career, he needs to hire a minion.
Minion, secretary, assistant. Somebody to GIVE him ideas. After all, Dave had full potential to follow through with an idea (hopefully), so as long as he got an idea from somebody he's good to go.
Turns out Dave and I are in the same situation. With two differences:
a. I am not seeking the earth's destruction.
b. I do have the capability to produce original ideas.

So it's not totally one in the same here.

Long made up evil villain story short, I love emails! So Joe, if you feel the need to contact me about anything, don't think I won't answer! I will answer and I will probably follow through. I'll at least consider. Unless its just dumb. Then again I like reading the dumb ones too, so just send away!